What is it with lesbians and farms/crunchy food purveyors? Go to any local farmer’s market — and New England has a few — and it’s crawling with lesbians. Selling the produce, buying it, growing it — they’re all over the place. There’s a particularly cute fruit seller near where I live, and I mean she’s so cute she makes my heart thump when I see her. She doesn’t work every day, but I sometimes stop and buy something when she’s there. Does that make me a stalker? I wonder. Today she even asked me if I wanted a plastic or a paper bag, and then she made eye contact when I paid…! It was all nearly too much for me. It made me wonder, though — supposing I thought she was really hot (which I do) and I wanted to try to find out more about her (relationship status, sexual orientation, etc…) how would I make the first move? Does it happen that you can meet someone in the midst of a daily transaction like that — would I just say, “I was wondering if you might be free for coffee sometime this week?” or maybe “I can hardly breathe when I see you, you’re so fucking hot, can I buy you a drink?” All the old bar lines won’t work — “are you here on your own?” isn’t relevant at work. “Do you live nearby?” “Are you from here?” This is all so lame!!! I guess it’s just as well it’s all in the realm of the hypothetical…but seriously, if I just wanted to be friends with her, what would I say?
4 responses so far ↓
Tlc // April 20, 2008 at 3:00 am |
I think the “I can’t breathe when I see you” one might get her attention! I love this…and can so relate. Women can be so hard to flirt with, meet, talk to, etc..& I think it’s especially hard if you “read as straight” as I do. Sometimes I’ve gotten the the “What the fuck are you lookin’ at?” glare from some sweet butch when all I’m thinking is “Oh my God, you’re so cute, but I can’t think of anything to say to you!” Just keep visiting her apple cart…she’ll get the vibe sooner or later. Good luck!
freedomgirl // April 21, 2008 at 6:33 am |
Yeah, if I were really looking for a new girl, I would do it. I would have nothing to lose, right? Since I’m not, I’ll leave her alone, since it’s not fair to try to make friends with someone who makes your knees weak. Kind of like false pretenses…also if she were attracted to me, wouldn’t it be like teasing her with something she can’t have? It’s all so complicated…
Dylan // May 20, 2008 at 10:49 pm |
That’s why god invented missed connections on craigslist. Seriously, I’ve never used it, but I think it is evidence to how many people experience this same dilemma every day.
The note from TLC cracks me up. There have been times when feminine women were looking at me and I thought to myself… “god, why does this girl have to judge me!”… shit, next time it happens, I’m just to pretend she’s looking at me because she thinks I’m sexy!
jealousy « Freedomgirl // June 6, 2008 at 8:24 am |
[...] to have a crush on someone even though I have absolutely no intention of acting on it. Note the fruit-seller. M. has seen her, and thinks it’s cute that I like her so much. Granted, she’s got [...]